Top 20 Candies That Never Should Have Been

By Jamie Walden

There are lots of amazing sweets out there. But there are a few that never should have been. Here’s our list of the 20 candies the world and our tastebuds could have done without.

Be sure to SHARE if you laughed as hard as we did remembering these sweets.

mary-janes
Source: costumeexpress.com

20. Mary Janes

The best way to tell a trick-or-treater you hate them.
 


 
red-hots
Source: candywarehouse.com

19. Red Hots

I’m pretty sure this was the 90s version of the cinnamon challenge.
 


 
runts
Source: economycandy.com

18. Runts

Like eating fruit-shaped plaster that tastes nothing like the corresponding fruit.
 


 
banana-laffy-taffy
Source: oldtimecandy.com

17. Banana Laffy Taffy

The rest of the flavors of get a pass, but Banana Laffy Taffy was just downright terrible.
 


 
jawbreaker
Source: collegecandy.com

16. Jawbreakers

Also known as ThroatStoppers.
 


 
good-plenty
Source: wikipedia.org

15. Good and Plenty

I’m fairly convinced Good and Plenty was a cruel joke by someone who hates children. Why else would you make BLACK licorice candy WHITE unless you want to see a kid grimace like a baby eating a lemon for the first time? There’s plenty of this candy alright, on account of it not being any good.
 


 
smarties
Source: firstwefeast.com

14. Smarties

Never a smart choice.
 


 
dots
Source: applecandyco.com

13. Dots

If ever in your life you’ve eaten these, chances are there is still some stuck to your teeth.
 


 
bubble-gum-cigars
Source: lolcandy.com

12. Bubble Gum Cigars

Did no one find it odd when we began developing a tobacco genre of candy?
 


 
circus-peanuts
nuts.com

11. Circus Peanuts

I imagine this is what a packing peanut tastes like.
 


 
mystery-dum-dum
Source: candywarehouse.com

10. Mystery Dum Dum

You never knew which terrible flavor was going to happen to you.
 


 
wax-coke-bottles
Source: simonandkabuki.com

9. Wax Coke Bottles

Don’t get me wrong, I love a good syrupy flavor as much as the next kid. But when the first step to enjoying a piece of candy is chomping teeth-first into a piece of wax, I’m out.
 


 
now-and-later
ehow.com

8. Now and Later

Or never.
 


 
twizzlers
Source: candywarehouse.com

7. Twizzlers

It’s like eating a twisted candle.
 


 
conversation-hearts
Source: scholastic.com

6. Conversation Hearts

Even the generationally updated “Text Me” can’t save this terrible treat.
 


 
big-league-chew
Source: collectingcandy.com

5. Big League Chew

Because why wouldn’t you want to grow up to be a disgusting guy with a giant tumor-ish bulge in your cheek and a Jay Leno chin? (We also especially like the “Less Money Pak” in this photo. Ahhh, grammar.)
 


 
candy-corn
Source: wikipedia.org

4. Candy Corn

Little known fact: You only have to buy one bag of candy corn and just break it back out every Halloween. No one will eat them and they’ll still taste just as bad as when they were fresh.
 


 
double-bubble
Source: economycandy.com

3. Double Bubble

Reading this sentence lasts longer than it’s chalky, unforgettable flavor.
 


 
black-jelly-beans
Source: ohnuts.com

2. Black Jelly Beans

It’s like stepping on a lego for your mouth.
 


 
just_like_dad_candy_cigarettes
Source: mcphee.com

1. Candy Cigarettes

Go home, America. You’re drunk.

Got a candy to add? Or one in the list to defend? Share your opinion in the comments below.

treatsie